(Previous Journal entry about Paris Attacks)
I just wanted to thank all of you for your support, you have no idea how much it means to me ...
I still can't believe what happened this night, this seems so... unreal. And yet ...
I went earlier to bed after coming through a kind of heartbreaking event occured in the end of the afternoon (which I may mention later, perhaps), which saddened me a lot. I really wasn't up to do anything of my night, so I went to sleep at 9pm.
And maybe one hour later, I have been woken up by my phone. A text from my aunt telling me she was at her appartment, and she was fine. No big deal, maybe she made a sender-mistake, and I went back to sleep. Another text, from a friend I haven't been in touch since a while, asking me "Are you safe ?"
. And another one, from a close friend this time: "Where are you ? Please tell me you're not in Paris"
I got up, turned on my computer and check my facebook first. "Stay safe"
"Omg tell me you're all fine"
"What the fuck is happening..."
"Parisians, are you safe ?"
"I'm freakin scared... I can't believe it..."
I ran down the stairs, and bursted into the living room. My dad and my brother were watching the news. The breaking news.
Scenes of chaos, screams, intervention forces,
... white blankets over dead bodies...
Then the sum-up of what happened so far:The explosion of the kamikaze outside the Stade de France during the France- Germany football encounter
The hostage taking in the Bataclan theater,... which ended up in a mass slaughter, with more than 100 dead people
And the multiple and random shooting all over Paris ...
Youth peoples enjoying their friday night with friends and family at some café, other enjoying a concert of the Eagles of Death Metal...
... Then suddenly and brutaly murdered by cold and mindless terrorists who had nothing to lose.
My whole body started to shake uncontrollably, of anger, of fear, ... of bewilderment. It never happened to me before.
I started to send texts, to my whole family, to people I'm not really in touch with, to my friends, to former collegues etc ..."We're all fine. Please tell me you're safe"
I went back up in my room, sending facebook messages to friends from all over the world, to tell them I'm fine.
I spent the whole night to contact all the people I care, know, close of former friends ...
I barely slept. I just couldn't...
The next morning was bitter. My mom got up before me and discovered the horror of last night. I sat with her and watch the news on TV.
The number of dead people was even more important, and injuried people were around a hundreds ...
I saw a man, a survivor from the Bataclan massacre, telling what he witnessed inside the theater. A freakin nightmare, people trapped, trying to escape while the killer were reloading their weapons, people stepping over the dead body to get away, other seriously injuried or riddled with bullets. And then the killers triggered their explosive belts ...
I checked facebook, people were reblogging missing person appeals... Youths, Adults who's been lastly seen around the Republique streets (all the shootings) or who planned to go to the Bataclan (the massacre), from their friends and/or family, because they haven't send any news yet...
... I bursted in tears.
This was too much. We didn't need such a horror. I couldn't believe it. Not in Paris... Not again...
And yet I'm incredibly lucky, my parents, my 2 brothers, we were all at home together when the attacks happened. We live in Paris' north-western subburbs.
All my friends were fine, it goes the same with all my family.
I can't even imagine the horror people witnessed being over there when it happened.
I can't even imagine the sorrow of people who have lost someone they care about during the attacks. All my thoughts go to these people, and I sincerly hope they could overcome their grief thought this terrible ordeal. Everyone is in mourning.
... I'm so sad, I can't understand ...EDIT:
I'm aware there is much worse in the world in term of violence and loss of people, that other horrors happens everyday in such an intensity of violence. Some of you may think that I react in a hypocrite way because I strongly react to what happened in Paris, and I haven't said a thing about the Beyrouth attacks in Liban. The fact in happened close to where I live, that people I know may have been killed or injuried because they have the habit to hang out in such place (fortunately, they're all safe), the fact that THIS TIME, RANDOM PEOPLE WERE THE TARGET, CHILDREN, YOUTHS, ADULTS, MEN, WOMEN, ELDERS, MAYBE GAY OR STRAIGH OR WHATEVER, MAYBE BELIEVER OR NON BELIEVER, JEWISH, CHRISTIANS, MUSLIMS AND WHATNOT.
They killed humans with no distinction.
So yes, this tragedy shocked me a lot, like a lot of people.Please don't blame people trying to go through their grief, and being in mourning, by telling them they act hypocritically since horror like this happens everyday in some place and no one gives a shit. Don't act like a victime telling them that this is not the fault of your religion, we hear that every day and we don't care anymore, we know how to take things into consideration. The matter is that people in mourning REALLY DON'T NEED TO HEAR THAT. THEY LOST SOMEOME THEY CARE. Instead of blaming them or defending your religion, which I think both are kinda misplaced, CONFORT THESE PEOPLE. THAT ALL THEY NEED NOW.
... I'm not even feeling safe in my own country...Bloody shitty brainwashed integrists.
They are the cancer of Humanity.
"It's a beautiful day outside,
birds are singing, flowers are blooming...
on days like these, brainwashed integrists like you ..."
"should be burning in hell."